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April Fools AF: Our Running Roundup

April Fools’ jokes- great if you’re on the giving end, but palm-to-the-face annoying when on the receiving end. Case in point: my wife told me Duke’s loss to Michigan State last night was under review because there was an infraction on the last play of the game, and I half believed it. Palm meet face.

It’s also a time for running companies and races to take a break from Monday Motivations and product pushes and post something completely ridiculous that half their followers will still believe. Here are some of our favorites:

Baltimore Marathon Course Change

After 26.2 miles, this year’s runners will take a *minor* detour into the pristine waters of the Inner Harbor. Antibiotic-laced Gatorade awaits them at the finish line.


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Due to complaints about last year’s race not TECHNICALLY finishing in the Inner Harbor, we will extend all routes by .1 miles this year, so the race can LITERALLY END IN THE INNER HARBOR! 💦 After 26.2 miles, participants will be required to dive in and swim from the National Aquarium to the rocky shores of Rash Field, where a cold beer awaits. 🍻 What better way to cool off after a long race??? Don’t worry, life jackets and flippers will be available to those who don’t know how to swim! Check out our stories for the updated route map! . . . . #mondaymotivation #innerharbor #visitbaltimore #runbaltimore #runbmore #baltimorerunfest #baltimorerunningfestival #baltimore #run #running #runner #marathon #marathoner #halfmarathon #halfmarathoner #aprilfools

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Special Edition Yeezy Geodes

Fifty lucky owners with access to a table saw get the pre-release of Yandhi. It’s like Willy Wonka’s golden ticket scam except you can’t eat the shoes.

DONNA Marathon Poppin’ Corks on the Course

The last half marathon I ran, I spent 12 miles looking for spectator booze (SoCal does not know how to race party, I swear there was booze every half mile at the Baltimore half) until I finally found some. Champagne aid stations solve that problem. Seriously though, this needs to be a real thing.

A.K.A. What I Eat After a Long Run, Just as a Modern Art Piece

This isn’t so much a great April Fools joke since my whole culinary existence is just a Taco Bell burrito bowl separated out and staged at intervals throughout the day.

Nike Vaporfly “More Than a 4% Feeling” Special Edition Boston

Made for the 125th Boston Marathon in 2021, the shoe honors the band Boston, “the one that plays that song that goes like, you know” according to anyone under the age of 40. (And yes, Thomas made this shoe up).

Swish Swish

If there’s one certainty come race day, it’s that your “tech” shirt will certainly fit you perfectly. So let’s build on that and bust out the swimsuits for the Snohomish River Run in October in Washington state. Nothing can go wrong with that.


Boston Loves Them Some Boston

Boston loves Boston even when they’re joking about Boston. So don’t worry, if you didn’t get your hands on any of the disgusting pairs of Boston-themed shoes, you can dig into a Boston Cream Pie Gu at mile 19, then crap your pants while slowly laboring up Heartbreak Hill.

The Reverse April Fools Joke

Just to really mess with everyone’s heads, The Woodlands Marathon decided to give an actual discount today. So…uh…yeah- go get that discount.

Should be Required Fuel at Spartan Races

This is for all those dudes who are like “oh I put Ghost Pepper hot sauce on my toothbrush for fun.” Cool story, I guess you win this conversation? I wish there were a way to figure out their bib number and actually hand this to them around mile 22.

We’re sure there are many more out there, but we have better things to do with our time. Like photoshopping a Nike VF 4% for a few hours during the workday.

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